Belly Buttons are Ugly
October 08, 2003, 9:02 p.m.

Ugh. I was operating on four hours sleep and a hell of a lot of caffeine today. Got my essay in – think it was shit. Less said on that the better. Budgie turned up today with only 400 words and a horror story – thankfully managing to wrangle and extension. I cheered her up with my story of criminal behaviour from a few days before.

I have a sinking feeling that the English essay due in next week isn’t due on the Friday like I hope, but the Wednesday. Bastards. I hope hope hope it’s not. I’m not sure how to find out as all the information is on the English Department website, which appears to have disappeared into thin air. Double bastards!

Which segues nicely into my following rant, concerning a certain member of the English Department, Dr Diane Speed. Now, she’s lecturing on Tolkien’s The Lord of the Rings, and, as well as making it about as interesting as attending a silent film blindfolded by simply repeating the plot, she is massacring his language.

Now, the man dedicated an entire appendix to pronunciation, and Dr Speed herself must suffer the annoyance of mispronunciation (you pronounce her name Dee-ahn, not Dye-ann), so you’d think the least she could do would be to read the damn appendix, which she clearly has not done. If you’re that stuck lady, just pronounce it the way they do in the film – they did re-shoot an entire scene to get the pronunciation of palantír correct.

Here, for your amusement, are a list of her pronunciations of certain names and places:

  • Izzengard
  • Boroma
  • Ro-han (with a very nasal a)
  • Sawron
  • Farama
  • Leggerlass
  • Izilder
    And, this isn’t a LotR mispronunciation, but nevertheless,
  • Commatose

    • Ngargh! This woman must be stopped!

    She also, in telling us what happened to Legolas and Gimli after the Ring quest, said that the pair “[went] off to explore each other’s favourite places.” We all erupted in juvenile giggles.

    Go the inter-special love : )

    Mmph. I think it’s time for me to enter a trance-like state in front of the television, and let it infect my mind with consumerist desires. Cashtastic!

    Ooh, but before I go – check out this link, which I found through Sif’s diary. It’s freaking scary – I never realised belly buttons were considered so ugly.

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