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Can't Touch This
October 29, 2003, 9:20 p.m. I got this question off 365 Journal Prompts: How much touch is comfortable with you? With family? With friends? With strangers? I’m a very tactile person. I hug people hello, goodbye, in comfort – I’m also known for grabbing girls’ breasts in play. But I’m well aware that other people aren’t as comfortable as I am with touch, so I rarely initiate it with strangers. Just recently a girl who I know by name and a few conversations, gave me a hug in commiseration for having to write an essay – it surprised me, but I accepted it. I would now feel comfortable hugging her hello and goodbye, and touching her casually. Touch among family members is pretty regular – hugs hello, goodbye, and in comfort. My dad particularly like to hug us – perhaps that’s where I got it from. My mum not so much, though she does hug me when I ask for it. Men who I don’t know, who hug me, make me kinda uncomfortable. Because I don’t know them, and I’ve been brought up in our society, which is particularly good at fostering rape/pervert fears in girls, I get a little weirded out. Also, I guess I’m not just used to guys being tactile. I don’t mind it if I know them and am close to them: then they transcend gender and just become ‘friend’. Touch for me is a way of transmitting feelings that would sound clichéd if expressed vocally. I enjoy it, and feel it adds to my relationships with my friends. I bought some dazzlingly pink nail polish today, for my flirty nature, and some stately metallic blue polish, for my serious nature. Yay! I also bought some eyeshadow. So much spending . . . but it makes me feel happy. I also started work on my Christmas lists today, deciding what to get people. I have some good ideas, and am well pleased with myself for getting ready so early. Hopefully this Christmas will be a quiet stay-at-home affair, and I’ll be able to see my friends more. Also, Return of the King on Boxing Day! Whee! So much to look forward to – once the exams are all over : P
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